Inbetween

I am in a state of inbetween. Inbetween jobs. Inbetween a relationship. And inbetween homes. I have had to come to terms with this state of being. I have decided that being inbetween is not such the bad thing. I am not stopped. I am looking at where I have been, and calculating where I want to go. I am looking into the future. And in doing so I have realized three crucial points.

1) I have family to fall back on. Parents who are willing and happy to rearrange their lives to include me and my boys.

2) I have friends to fall back on. Those closest to me who support and nurture me when I need it most. The best of the best who choose to love me. No requirements for them.

3) I have my boys to fall back on. They have proven themselves to be well-adjusted and happy teenagers who don't hold their mother's failures against her. Two amazing boys who take life's kicks in stride and stand by my side, looking at the view of the future, offering their support. Their love.

I realize in the grand scheme things of things, I am not a failure. I took a calculated risk in a job that was not a guaranteed permanent position. I don't regret this decision. I had a six month amazing experience working with great people. I learned that I do not want a job that does not challenge me. I learned that my previous job was breaking me down from the inside out and is not an option to go back to. I learned that I have a lot to offer. Ultimately, I learned.

So now I prepare to pack up my belongings. Spring cleaning 101. Now is the time where I question every knick knack and donate all the clothes that "I might get back into one day". I am ready to say goodbye to a house that I really didn't like, though I will miss my privacy. I am ready to embark on a new journey in this same old life of mine. I am ready.

So in this inbetween that I am currently residing, I have planted flowers. My view is sunny with scattered fluffy clouds. My quest is to use this inbetween to better my future and that of my boys.

Game on!